Salute!

Robert Mondavi, the charismatic Napa Valley vintner whose work helped establish California wines as among the world's best, died this morning.

He was 94 years old.




Throughout his lifetime, Robert Mondavi successfully developed a number of premium wines that earned the respect of wine drinkers and fellow vintners around the globe.

In 1966, he founded the Robert Mondavi Winery in the Napa Valley with the goal of producing wines that would rival the finest wines of Europe.

In the 80s he entered into a joint venture the Baron Philippe de Rothschild of Château Mouton Rothschild to create Opus One Winery.

I have a modest 35-bottle collection of Cabernet Sauvignon and Pinot Noirs. By far, the crown jewel of my collection sits in the middle of my wine fridge for a very special day. It is a bottle of Opus One 1998*




* Supple and lush, the 1998 Opus One shows an opaque purple color and intense aromas of blackberries, vanilla, and roasted espresso.

Can you dig it?

I think that his longevity is proof positive that happiness and red wine consumption (in moderation) can go a long way towards an extended and healthy life.

I raise a glass to you sir.

I am fairly sure you made it to heaven.

We all know how much Jesus loved to get his drink on.

WWRJD

Jesus used to hang out with a prostitute, so I really think he would have made a better Democrat.

The Pope wears Prada too

I am fairly sure that I am going to Hell for my past blog posts about the Catholic church.

Even if that one was not enough to do it, my post about Opus Dei, will seal my fate.

With that in mind, I don't mind saying that I believe the Pope sets a really bad example by wearing Prada shoes and Serengeti sunglasses.




For one, it sends a bad message to devote Catholics around the globe who live in abject poverty.

'There is still one thing lacking. Sell all that you own and distribute the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me. Jesus looked at him and said, 'How hard it is for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!'" [Luke 18:18-23]

Secondly, a grown man wearing bright red loafers is totally gay.
The Catholic church does not need to reinforce that type of image.

Turning on Jesus

It's no wonder that the little boy has his hands deep in his pockets.

Onward Christian Soldiers

I am so happy and comforted to know that the right wing in this country is firmly rooted in their strong Christian values.

Values found in the New Testament of the Bible like "live in peace", "turn the other cheek" and "love thy brother".



All sarcasm aside, it has always been obvious to me that most Republicans have never bothered to closely read the New Testament.

Hey John Boy ... Perhaps this is a fairly good reason why we should not "bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran".

Will Dumbledore be crucified in the end?

Everybody seems to love Harry Potter.

I must admit that these books are not my cup of tea.

Two or three weeks before the official midnight July 21st release date of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows", there were several blogs and web sites that claimed to have advanced copies of the book. A few even went so far as to publish what they said was the final chapter of the anticipated seventh installment.




Needless to say, these blogs experienced incredible traffic due to the popularity of the Harry Potter series.

I felt that I needed to top this publicity stunt in order to drum up some additional web traffic on my blog.

But where could I find a book more popular than the Harry Potter finale?

Think Peter ... think.

Think dammit!

Got it!

I'll wait for the Barabbas & Pontus Pilot playset

Early next month, 425 Wal-Mart chain stores nationwide will begin carrying faith-based toys from One2believe.

One2believe is an innovative toy company that is ministry partners with Focus on the Family and Opus Dei. They specifically target born again parents who would much rather that their kids play with a Samson action figure than a Spider-Man action figure.

These parents can buy the "big man" himself.





If money is no object for junior's Christmas, you can go out and purchase the entire nativity scene.




Or if you want two overly muscular guys wrestling with each other in a homo-erotic pose (Pictured below), you can get that too.

(They are actually Samson* and the nine foot Philistine warrior Goliath*)

*Sold separately and scale completely ignored.




In case you think they left the girls out, you are dead wrong.

For the girls they have created the P31 series. P31 dolls are specifically designed to provide a Bible-based, Christian alternative to other secular toys on the market (like the notorious Bratz Dolls), and to encourage young girls to pursue biblical womanhood.

This is the lovely and creepy Elizabeth P31**.




**Also available in the homegirl version.

Elisabeth stands 18 inches tall, has beautiful empty eyes, long blonde hair, and a contemporary Christian outfit. Elisabeth comes complete with an accessory kit, containing a Bible lesson (based on Proverbs 31:20), two cookie-cutters, and a cookie recipe (Pictured below). She also comes complete with a list of exciting activities like abstinence, getting on her knees and self flagellation.




But don't worry boys and girls.

For those of you who like to play with the other kind of toys ... Wal-Mart has provided another "back to school" sale just an aisle away***.





***Strict limit of 5 boxes per customer.

Immaculate Confection

Artist Cosimo Cavallaro has sculpted a naked 6-foot tall milk chocolate statue of Jesus. The sculpture was to debut Monday evening at the Lab Gallery inside Manhattan's Roger Smith Hotel, just four days before Christians mark the crucifixion of Jesus Christ on Good Friday.




Perhaps the Tom Waits song “Chocolate Jesus” inspired Cosimo.

Cavallaro’s artwork has upset many Catholics preparing for Holy Week.
"This is one of the worst assaults on Christian sensibilities ever," said Bill Donohue, head of the Catholic League, a watchdog group. "It's not just the ugliness of the portrayal, but the timing - to choose Holy Week is astounding."

I have to strongly agree with Mr. Donohue.

I think that Jesus should be immediately melted down in a double broiler.
Then, he should be poured over a giant bowl of Häagen-Dazs vanilla bean ice cream. Then, his holiness should be liberally covered with chopped nuts, sprinkles, whipped cream and a cherry on top.




Perhaps the Lord’s Day should be spelled Sundae!

Dig in!